UGHH

So, most of my "happy" life has come to an agonizing slow, almost halt and I finally have a reason! These past eight weeks (I can't believe it has been 8 weeks already!) have been a nightmare in the nursing department. Staring w/ the cracked nipples (sorry if TMI), then moving on to thrush, clogged ducts, and vasospasms- all of which I didn't know I had for about 3 weeks. At 5 weeks, I finally called the lactation nurse because of all the pain I was experiencing when I nursed AND after... for HOURS at a time. After hit and miss of different medications and tests, and trial and error, we finally got rid of the thrush, but I still am getting clogged ducts and vasospams. What are vasospams, you ask- basically, a migraine in the breast. Go figure. Sometimes babies clamp down too hard while nursing and cut off the blood supply, causing burning and sharp pains through the breast and throughout your entire body. They are caused by nursing. The thing is, if I don't nurse, I keep getting clogged ducts. Most often, I have both pains at the same time and HAVE to nurse to clear the clog. Typically, I have been down and out for the entire day, if this happens. Pumping doesn't work, as this is doing the same thing- different cone sizes and all. So, my only choices: 1) stop nursing, or 2) suffer through the pain. Sadly, I am trying to stop nursing, but still have to wean her, so I am still suffering some problems even doing this. I am sad I have to give it up, but realize I have to if I am going to survive. So life goes.

A few things I have learned. I really do enjoy nursing- when it doesn't hurt. Pumping really is a hassle and takes WAY too much time. Thrush is a beast to deal with... all the sterilizing, cleaning, laundry,...- ugh! I eat when I feel like crap- hence the whole WW not really working these past few weeks. Sleep and a healthy body (for the most part) are KEY to functioning and getting anything done. I can't wait for this chapter to be done and overwith!

Growing Up

Bed time and Charlotte have now become one of my least favorite combinations. Chloe and Bedtime- another combo I dislike. Basically, bedtime in general is chaos. Last night, Kevin attempted to alleviate or "solve" our Charlotte issue. He put her on her mattress on the floor. Chloe made the jump to "big" bed about this time and did pretty well. So he tried the same thing last night with Charlotte. It worked wonderfully. Today during nap time, we checked on her and found this:

Charlie and Chloe love to "hide" under the crib and under the island in the kitchen. Who knew she would fall asleep under there!

Oh so naive...

Silly me. I thought I could start WW and lose some weight. Silly me. I failed to factor in the utter chaos that is my life right now. I failed to factor in how exhausted I would be. I failed to realize how little I would want to figure out food to eat when I only have a few moments each day to eat. Silly me. Now that I have figured this out, I am trying to be a little more realistic. I am not going to worry so much about losing the weight right now as much as I am about eating better and watching my portions. In short, counting points, but not necessarily "counting them" - yet. Instead, I want to try and get my butt in gear. I bought some new running shoes today. I went to the store and the salesman told me my shoes I was wearing - 3 years old. Yep, that is the last time I bought new running shoes. That just shows you have serious I have been the last 3 years about running. I want to turn a new leaf. Remember that double jogging stroller I bought last fall? It's time to pull it from the cobwebs and put it to use. So, walking/running and some WW's in the mix, less guilt, and more sleep. I hope that is the winning combination to my weight loss goals...let's hope I can get started and stick to it!

BTW, Kevin is losing like a champ. It is disgusting how little effort he needs to put forth in order to lose some pounds. I am so jealous!

Big Sister

I love this photo. Chloe loves Chantelle and is such a little mommy! Ahhh... this melts my heart.

Time Out

Time Out is clearly not as effective at our house as it probably is at other's. Chloe gets sent and Charlie goes and joins her - even if the reason Chloe is in time out is because she did something to Charlie. Charlie doesn't care. She thinks it is a game. Good grief!

Preschool 2009

Well, in yet another attempt to save some money, I decided to do my own little preschool. I have to be honest. I DID NOT want to do this, but felt I had to do something with/for Chloe for preschool. My SIL, Annie, did preschool for her little girls and some other kids and since her kids are so incredibly smart, I thought... I can do this. So I emailed her and some other incredible friends and asked for some suggestions, resources, etc. THANKS EVERYONE! I got such a plethora of ideas and activities. The more I researched and started planning, the more excited I have become. I went to the dollar store and bought a bunch of school supplies and decorated one of the empty rooms in our house and designated it as preschool. Chloe LOVES it and Charlie makes trouble. I love it! There are so many great ideas and creative people out there. I am so excited to be teaching my little ones. Who knew? Here are pics from our "first day" of preschool!

Making soft pretzels - the letter A (and C for Chloe!)

Santa Cruz

We had the opportunity to head to Santa Cruz for a quick trip with some friends. Trevor and Alisha's parents have a beach house in Aptos that we were able to crash - what a great get away! I was hesitant to pack the girls up and go away for an overnighter, but I am glad we did. We headed out Saturday afternoon and hung out on the beach, enjoyed a relaxing dinner, hung out, watched a movie. It was great. AND, all of the girls slept GREAT! I was so worried they would be up crying most of the night because of the unfamiliar surroundings- it was just the opposite. I guess playing at the beach wore them out!

Family of 5!!

Before the kill... no no Charlie!

Chloe found some sand crabs... gross!